Want to avoid telemarketing calls to your cell phone number? Just call the
"National Do Not Call Number" from your cell phone (888/382-1222). It will
only take a minute of your time, and it will block your number for five years!
You can also register on-line with the Federal Trade Commission at their web site
Now you can turn off annoying TV sets with the press of a button on a small key fob
device called TV-B-Gone which scans 200 infrared codes that control the power on about
1000 TV models. The device was invented by a San Francisco resident annoyed by the
proliferation of blaring TV's in public places, such as airports. His next work will
no doubt by the Cellphone-B-Gone.
Write down September 30, 2005, if you would like to attend the Illinois State PDCA Golf
Tournament at the beautiful Weaver Ridge Golf Course in Peoria. Call Illinois Council
Secretary Bob Ireland at 815/741-4331 if you wish to receive the invitation mailing.
Bob is a Past President of National PDCA, and the proprietor for many years of his own
paint contracting company in Joliet, Ireland Decorating. These days, Bob remains involved
with volunteer work for the Illinois Council of PDCA and stripes the occasion parking lot
for his old company just to keep in shape.
Persons abiding in a domicile built of silica combined with metallic salts should not
carelessly project geologic specimens. In other words, people who live in glass houses
shouldn't throw rocks.
The trouble with bucket seats is that no everyone has the same size bucket.
Observations on these changing times: have you realized that, in 40 years, we will have
thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?
Reading about drywall may be as interesting as watching paint dry, but installing it is
more difficult. Help is on the way from USG, the world's largest manufacturer of gypsum
panels. Cruise the internet to their drwall web site at www.usg.com/diydry/drywal01.htm
to learn everything you ever wanted to know about drywall but were afraid to ask. Be
patient...you'll have to wade through seemingly endless advertisinginformation on their
monumental list of products to find the gold.
While we're talking web site usage for useful information, here's one that veterans may
wish to visit for help on available benefits. Listing about 500 federal and state benefits
available to qualified veterans, it is sponsored by the government: www.govbenefits.gov.
A recent search for a World War II vet produced 21 benefit programs that he was still
A new employee at a large company was standing by the machine, looking confused, when a
co-worker offered to help. "How does this thing work," she inquired. "It's simple," the
other lady noted, taking the thick report from her colleague's handings and feeding it
into the shredder. "I see," said the novice. "But how many copies will it make?"
The reporter was asking an elderly lady who had reached 104 years of age what she thought
was the best part of growing so old. "No peer pressure," she observed quickly.
Great Britain's Prime Minister, Tony Blair, is the rare friend one finds among foreign
government officials. When he was interviewed recently and asked why he believed so
strongly in America and President Bush, he responsed, "A simple way to take the measure
of a country is to look at how many want in ...and how many want out."
The next time you're shaking your head about the Federal Tax Code, just remember that
Albert Einstein once noted "The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax!"
Of course, Benjamin Franklin's famous take was, "Nothing in this world is certain but
death and taxes."
Pity the hapless airline pilot who miscalculated his land approach and hammered his ship
really hard onto the runway. Finding it difficult to look his passengers in the eye as
they filed out, and expecting sarcastic comments, he was relieved when the only person
left was an old lady walking unsteadily out the door and leaning on her cane. Just when
he thought he was out of the woods, she turned and inquired, "Son, do you mind if I ask
a question?" He responded courteously, "Why not at all, ma'am, what is it? Without batting
an eyelash, she asked, "Tell me...did we land, or were we shot down?"